I Can Hear His Heartbeat
by deathmakesapoet
Summary: [ONESHOT] The scene where Mikasa holds Eren in her arms and bawls her eyes out after he emerges from the titan body is one of my favorite scenes in the entire manga and also the anime. After watching Episode 8, I've been inspired to write this short in an attempt to describe all the emotions and thoughts of the characters in this extremely emotional scene. Mikasa/Eren


**Disclaimer : I do not own Shingeki no Kyojin or any of its characters. Isayama Hajime does.**

**A/N : The scene where Mikasa bawls her eyes out with Eren in her arms after he emerges from the titan body is one of my favorite scenes in the manga. After watching the anime version of this scene as depicted in Episode 8, I was inspired to write this short story to sort of flesh out all the thoughts and feelings of the characters in that extremely emotional scene. Well, mainly Mikasa, Armin and a little bit of Jean. :P Too many characters to cover them all. I made a reference to my other oneshot (Heartbeat) in this fic because it suddenly seems so canon now. :D Haha. Go check it out after you've read this fic!  
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**Without further ado, please enjoy the story. :) Remember to leave a review to motivate me to write even more! Hehe.**

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**I Can Hear His Heartbeat**

"Whatever. Let's get going," Jean said with a hint of disgust in his voice. "There's no way that monster is on our side! Titans are Titans." He took a final glance at the carnage left behind by the abnormal Titan before turning to walk away from the place. Deep in contemplation of the strange turn of events, he failed to notice that no one was following him.

_I won't admit that a Titan saved us. Never. Titans are nothing more than monsters. Everyone who died under my command today died because of them. _Jean grimaced as the sobering thought of all the deaths he had witnessed today struck him like a slap to the face. _We just got lucky with this abnormal. Killing his own kind. I almost want to think that makes him worse than normal Titans._

Ignoring Jean's orders, the rest of the survivors continued to watch as an enormous amount of steam vented from the rapidly decaying Titan corpse. The heat that emanated from the body radiated outwards in all directions, raising the temperature in the vicinity greatly. Annie, Reiner and Bertholdt stood together as they observed the phenomenon in action; it almost seemed like they were waiting for something to happen.

Mikasa and Armin stood side by side and watched in silence as hot vapor continued to escape from the dead Titan's skin. Mikasa wanted to weep so badly at that moment. She wanted to scream and kick and cry out loud. The calmness of her appearance belied the choking despair that raged within herself. She knew what choosing to keep on living instead of just giving up meant. It meant that she would die bitter and alone. She would suffer an eternity of solitude and regret at having been too weak to protect the one person that made her life worth living. She knew all this and yet she chose to live on. It took a great deal of courage for her to make that decision, but deep down Mikasa really wished that she was weak instead. Then she could end her life and the pain would stop. _ You didn't keep your promise, Eren. You didn't._

Armin looked at his friend with a gaze full of sympathy. He'd known Mikasa long enough to know when there was something wrong with her. He knew how hollow she must have been feeling without Eren by her side. It was only natural that such sad thoughts would return to haunt them after the battle had ended and the adrenaline subsided. He wanted to say something to comfort her, but he struggled to find the words. Tears started to well up in his eyes as the image of Eren's gruesome death returned to plague him. _Eren. I'm sorry. I'm so useless. _

_Don't worry, Armin. Be confident. Your intuition has saved both me and Eren in the past. _The words Mikasa said to him back in the tower returned and struck in Armin's mind like a bolt of lightning, driving away the self-pity that clung to his being. He looked again at Mikasa's face and he knew what he had to do. A look of steely resolve washed over his features as he silently swore that he would take care of Mikasa no matter the cost. He owed it to Eren.

A sudden movement from within the steam cloud grabbed everybody's attention. "What is it?" Jean asked as he walked over to get a better view. Everyone stood frozen to the rooftop as the steam started to lessen and dissipate, revealing a humanoid figure in the nape of the Titan's neck. The figure pulled itself out from the tangle of Titan nerves that enveloped it, escaping from the fleshy restraints with little effort. _What the...who is that?_

Mikasa's heart seemed to forget how to keep a rhythm as the sight of the mysterious figure emerging from the Titan's flesh caused it to miss a beat. Ever since the first time it appeared to her, this particular Titan had given Mikasa a strange feeling that she couldn't quite put her finger on. She didn't want to believe it at first, but watching it fight its kindred earlier had given Mikasa a feeling of familiarity. Of love, even.

_It can't be. _Mikasa tried to say something to Armin but the words got stuck in her throat. The heart in her chest resumed its rhythm after the momentary lapse in beating, breaking into a rapid stacatto tempo that matched the chaotic blend of thoughts racing through her head. Leaping into the air, Mikasa fired the hooks of her 3D maneuver gear at the opposite building and swung herself towards the gigantic corpse.

"Mikasa!" Armin cried out in vain as he saw his friend swing towards the cloud of steam at full speed. Everyone watched helplessly as she completed the arc of her swing and landed a short distance away from the corpse.

_What is she doing?_ Jean wanted to go down and stop Mikasa, but he found himself rooted to the spot. His body would not obey him. As he mentally berated himself for being so weak, a sudden realization snapped him back into reality. "No way. No fucking way," he muttered under his breath as he turned his gaze back to the steaming corpse laying in the middle of the boulevard.

The moment her feet touched the ground, Mikasa sprinted towards the Titan. She could feel tears start to form at her eyes as all pretense of composure left her. To her, nothing else existed but the figure sticking out of the Titan's neck. She could see him now. But was that really him? Time seemed to stop as she launched herself onto the its back and locked Eren in a solid embrace. He was real, not an illusion. She could touch him. She could feel his hair on her skin and his weight in her arms. Her fingers clutched hard at his back as she tightened her hold on him. She didn't want to lose him ever again. As she knelt there on the titan's back with Eren in her arms, her mind seemed to take a few moments to register the fact that all this was really happening. She had given up all hope, but now hope was the only thing keeping her from collapsing on the spot. _  
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The happiness that enveloped Mikasa at that moment was overwhelming. Indescribable. She was whole again. But then a horrible thought crept into her mind, threatening to choke all the joy out of her body. _Is he alive? _As quickly as it came, the feeling of happiness drained away from Mikasa and was replaced by a thick sense of dread. _No, no, no, no._

Just as her sanity was about to give way to the dread that was poised to consume her, a memory resurfaced in Mikasa's head.

_Do you feel that? That's my heartbeat. Dad said everyone has one. As long as our hearts are still beating, we're alive. When it stops beating, we die. My heart's still beating. See? I'm not dead._ Eren had said those words to her on the first night she spent at the Jaeger household after the tragic deaths of her parents. She had trouble sleeping that night due to horrible nightmares, but Eren comforted her by putting her hand on his chest and saying those exact same words. _I'm not dead._

For a second, Mikasa forgot how to breathe. She quickly put her ear to Eren's chest, every fibre of her being filled with equal measures of hope and fear. She heard a faint thump. And then another thump. And then another one. Unable to contain herself any longer, tears started to flow uncontrollably from her eyes. Her entire body shook as she looked up to the Heavens and cried for the first time since she was a kid. Just like the steam coming out of the titan corpse below her, all her emotions escaped to the surface, finally free of all control. All the happiness, the sadness, the regret and the longing that she kept pent up within herself revealed to the world through each sob and each tear. But to Mikasa, none of that mattered. Nothing in this cruel world mattered besides one undeniable fact : she could hear his heartbeat. Eren was alive.

**THE END**

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**Thank you so much for taking the time to read this fic. :) **

**I will be releasing the first chapter of my new fic within the next few days. It will be a medium-length Eren/Mikasa fic (what did you expect?) set around Chapter 30 and 31. What if the Scouting Legion's expeditionary force was ambushed by titans before they could make it back to the safety of the wall? What if Eren and Mikasa had to survive together in titan territory with dwindling supplies and enemies around every corner? Would desperation tear them apart, or bring them closer together? Interested? Why not 'follow' me and find out when I post the first exciting chapter of this brand new fic? :) You won't be disappointed, I swear!  
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**Shameless self-advertising aside, thanks again for reading this fic. :) Please drop me a review! :D Thanks!  
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